This quote is very very present to where my life is at right now. Sure, I may not have a whole lot of quantifiable (research lingo coming out…) time to look back on through my 24 years of life, but nevertheless, I know I am a very different person than to who I was just last year. One year ago, I was an absolute wreck thinking, hoping, & praying my love could save.
My love did save. It saved me–I just didn’t know I needed to love & respect myself so much more to know that everything in my life could get better. And yea, best believe that life has gotten SO much better ✨❤️ I have been able to confront so many of my fears & insecurities, accomplish some of my oldest dreams, know what shit I will not stand for, & by golly, I have never felt so amazing with some added mental and physical strength. I have pushed myself in ways I didn’t know I could & that just inspires me to want to do that so much more. Yes, take a big ole bite from the world.
But there’s always those dips of uncertainty and doubt that make us revisit why some parts of our lives are one way, while we notice everyone else’s (for the most part) is at an entirely different speed than our own. I’ll be the first to admit that not having someone to intimately love is still kind of weird. I will forever be a hopeless romantic but upon seeking love, thinking that’s what will bring me ultimate happiness, means I’ve had it all wrong…finding that kind of love is not essentially the ‘greatest’ journey of all in this life. Being on the continuous search of who I am, who I choose to surround myself with, & who I want to work towards to become, is a greater lesson that having a person to say “I love you” to because truth be told, love blinds you. I don’t know if I’ve become anti-love, but clearly the universe has shown me that now is not my time and it’s honestly for the best. I give up on trying to find that because it’s a waste of time & effort when you’re clearly not ready for it (plus it’s so much easier being single 😋). But yea, carry on lovers… Imma be me–punching shit & sipping my coffee in the corner dreaming away my own independent dreams without any man#gohwhatadramaqueen 😁👊👑