I’ll try to write something short before the primary feelings leave me.
I feel the most sincere disappointment in people who are in positions of power and are in absolute denial of their flaws.
I just met with her today, when every fiber of me was against the idea, but we had to the yearly employee evaluation. Apathy has been growing ever since she last spoke so unprofessionally towards me. I am not bitter, I simply stopped caring what she could think of me, my work performance, and my attitude. No one should feel entitled to think that by enforcing their dominance–that be through tone of voice, hierarchy in the workplace, or simply humiliating someone else repetitively on what they have not done well–will grant motivational change in others.
Fuck no, bitch.
The world does not work that way and it is a shame when there are individuals who believe that is an acceptable way to express themselves. Thinking that for some reason or another, it is OKAY, and when questioned by others, they shut down everyone else. Please: that action only demonstrates your lack of receiving any kind of feedback and you showing how extremely close-minded and intolerant you are to whatever is against what you expect others to do. No one will ever be you; No one will work like you, and I hope no one ever wants to. You have continuously burned yourself out in all aspects: physically, mentally, emotionally, and probably spiritually. You do no one any good by wanting to take on additional responsibilities that are not yours to take in order to “aparentar” amazing, humble, and dedicated to serving the community.
If you cannot treat your own staff with dignity and respect, but rather treat them like you have the authority of a mother to “acosar” everyone like we were your kids–there is something terribly wrong with how you perceive decent human interactions should take place. It is not about just being perky and diplomatic to the “big guys”–the town officials, the donors, larger organizations that may want to collaborate and/or partner with us, or even being that way with the business corporations. Again, that is not how the world works and by doing that–acting so perky and ditzy in public, and later a totalitarian bitch behind closed doors, only shows the true nature of your essence.
…And I am glad I am walking away from all of that unscathed.